If the husband is honest with both you and with himself (read: How Do I Know If I Am Gay? Signs You Are Gay), that is when you can truly know that he is gay. The clearest way to know if your husband is gay is if he tells you. If a husband is gay, it can devastate not only the relationship but the straight wife as well. Sometimes a woman may have been in a heterosexual relationship for years and yet feel something is somehow 'off ' and she may find herself asking, 'Is my husband gay?' Many women find this question unthinkable but according to Bonnie Kaye, M.ED., an expert in women married to gay men, it is estimated that 4 million women have been, or are, married to gay men.
